Mail Order Bride

I read my answers aloud, as there was no one in the house to hear me.

“Eye color. Blue. Hair color. Yellow. Height. Sixty-four inches. Build. Slender.”

And so on.

“Please allow several weeks for delivery. Some assembly may be required.”

Surely that had been an error on the part of the typesetter? I could not fathom what sort of assembly might be warranted. Whatever the need be, I resolved, I was the man to provide for it.

The first days of waiting passed by in a flourish. I passed my time by preparing the house for my bride-to-be. New bedclothes, curtains and carpets adorned what was to be her bed chamber. Every inch of the home was scrubbed to a shine the likes of which the house had never seen.

Flower filled vases sat upon every horizontal surface in every room and the curtains in every window were tied back so as to let in the light of day. I purchased a phonograph and tinny music poured forth to fill the sitting room with sound.

I made any number of small repairs and improvements about the house, and took special care in the rear garden, to provide for my love-to-be a place of quaint solitude and beauty.





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