Happpy Birthday To Me

The leaves had begun to turn colors. This made the drive beautiful. “Let’s crack the windows and listen to some music”, said my wife as she pulled her bright red hair out of a ponytail, and reclined her seat a touch. Within seconds she was asleep. I didn’t care, I was enjoying the drive. While I was scrolling through the stations on the radio, I looked over to check her out again. All I could think about was the shower this morning. She laid there as the sun glistened off of her pale white skin on her pierced belly button and ample bosom. I had always been attracted to my wife, but there was something extra special about seeing her in that sort of attire. “This is going to be a great birthday!”, I smugly said to myself as I continued to flip flop checking her out and watching the road.

As we were near the gas station, the song on the radio was cut short and interrupted with a news bulletin: “This just in, another murder has been reported in Ottawa county at 10:55am. This is the 30th reported this morning. The local police authorities currently refuse to comment, except they ask that they are investigating and ask that Ottawa county residents please stay inside, lock your doors and call them if you notice anything strange.”

“Honey, did you hear that”, I said to Clara as I pulled into the gas station to get some ice for the cooler. She mumbled as she turned her head and went back to sleep. I proceeded to go in and get the ice. The clerk looked at me strangely as I swiped my card. “What’s his problem?”, I said to myself as I shook my head and walked back to the car. I popped the trunk to add the ice to the cooler. I couldn’t believe my eyes!

There was no camping gear, no cooler. It was just Clara lying there covered in blood. She was dead. She wasn’t in the pin-up attire that I had been so smitten with earlier. She was wearing a dress and her hair was brown, like always! Her hands and feet were tied behind her back and her mouth taped shut. I was in shock. I didn’t know what to do. I lowered the trunk to look back up front……... Clara was no longer there.  “Am I going crazy?”, I said to myself as I examined the body again. I ran back into the gas station to get help, but the guy at the counter was also dead. His throat had been cut and he had bled out all over the counter. “What is happening!”, I screamed as I fell to my knees in a state of shock and despair.

“You are surrounded, please drop the axe and come out with your hands up!” I heard as a police officer bellowed through a megaphone. “What axe?”, I said to myself as I looked down and noticed that I was covered in blood and had an axe gripped tightly in my right hand. When I looked up, I could see my reflection in the display case in front of the counter. I was wearing a bright red wig, cut off denim shorts, a flannel shirt tied at the waist exposing my tattoos, and shiny red high heels……. I smiled and laughed loudly as I stared at my reflection and touched up my lipstick.

The police charged inside the gas station and arrested me. I was being charged for the murders of thirty-two people, including my wife and the gas station clerk.





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This is me: home-writer, book-reader, dog-lover and occasional poet. I make this website to share my and my friends texts with You, dear Reader. Please: read carefully, don't be scary, upgrade your mood and be king and leave your comment. :)